The thing is lately I have been very frustrated with quite a few things. The job that I took has not turned out to be exactly what was explained to me. And that has caused some frustration. My hours are all over the place. I have to look at the schedule everyday to figure out when I’m supposed to be at work. I realize that sometimes work hours will change but I don’t feel like everyday should be different. I honestly never know when I’m supposed to be there. This Monday I went in 30 minutes early because of the crazy schedule. That’s frustrating.
I’m also been a little disappointed with a few people in my life. There’s been one person who has said some things that made me question quite a few things. And everytime I try to nail this person down to get some answers all I got was more questions. He’s very evasive. I don’t like that type of behavior. I’ve dealt with it all of my life and I’ve decided that at this point in life that I really don’t need that. If you can’t just say what you mean and mean what you say then there’s no point in saying anything at all.
Then on the other hand there is someone who is paying way too much attention to me. I’ve actually had to tell him to back off. He was blowing up my phone and it was just more than I wanted to deal with. And rather than him looking at the situation and saying oh maybe I should chill out a little bit he was more like well what’s your problem? Well, my problem, sir, is the fact that you’re being an overbearing asshole. So back the hell off.
Another thing is that I’ve just been plain old homesick. Well I’m in my hometown, my other home is in North Carolina. Today I got a message from one of my old best friends and she was escaping the hurricane and she went to Asheville. We both felt like it was the weirdest thing that she was there and I wasn’t. She text me while I was at work and it was all I could do to not just start crying at work because there she was where I’ve been longing to be for the last week. And it just kind of hit that here I am where I’ve been wanting to be for years and yet I’m longing to be there. And I know that part of the reason I want to be there is not good for me. But that doesn’t stop that little piece of me from wanting it. So instead of crying at work I sent her the names of places to go eat and things to do while she’s there.
So those are some of the things that I’ve been dealing with. It’s not just one thing. It’s several. I can typically handle one thing at a time but when it starts adding up to be multiple things sometimes I get a little overwhelmed and my feelings get a little in the way. I can’t help I have a tender heart.
So there’s the thing or actually things.