Another artistic outlet for me is painting. I’m still teaching myself and hope to learn more later. I live in a very artistic town. I have a lot of friends through various ways, including social media, who are artists. I hope to learn from them because I find their work to be beautiful. Here is my most recent painting. I gave it to my best friend for Christmas. She loved it. Well, at least she said she did. 
There are times when my creative well runs dry. I hate those times. I feel frustrated and angry. I am a creative person and it feels as if part of me is gone when that happens. Lately, though, I have been so overwhelmed with creative thought. It can be just as frustrating, though, when you don’t have time to bring these thoughts to fruition. I have had some thoughts on some paintings. It’s killing me that I actually have some ideas and I don’t have enough time to paint them. I have them in my head and I am going to have to do some quick sketches so I don’t lose them. I have some story ideas that I can’t develop but thankfully there are ideas! There have been times when there was absolutely nothing. Do any of you creative people do that? Go forever with no ideas and then it’s like you hit the mother lode? And they all come pouring in at once? It is a frustrating feeling because it is almost as bad as the dry spell. Today was supposed to be my day off from work and I was hoping to get some work done on some of this creativity. I’m on call, though. I got called in this morning and have to go back later to cover for someone else. So no creativity for me.
I don’t have time to write a great blog about this but wanted to put a blog up with some good info while I am thinking about it. If you want a list of 100 writing markets for free, you can get it. I may write more later but I had to write this while I was thinking. Have a good day!
Aubrey sat there and felt dead inside. That was the only way to describe it. Empty and dead. It was appropriate. All she could think about was the people she’d lost and buried years ago. She felt as dead as they were. It had only been ten years since she buried them. Amazing how time didn’t cure all wounds. It was a lie. How many times had people patted her hand or back and quietly said that time heals all wounds? She wished she could go back in time and tell them to quit lying.
It was Saturday night. Most people her age were either out celebrating life or enjoying their families. She was home alone. Well, she wasn’t completely alone. Her two cats were there with her. Luna and Bella kept her company when no one else would. They were her confidantes, her therapists, her friends.
At first she couldn’t figure out why today was so sentimental. Finally it dawned on her. Another anniversary. It seemed like every day was an anniversary of something. Every day was a reminder of lost loved ones. Typically she could numb herself in some way. Medications worked sometimes. Alcohol worked. Sometimes throwing herself into projects numbed her brain and body. Today was a day where a cocktail was needed. A little Xanax taken with a shot of tequila. She would feel better soon. And if not, hopefully she would just fall asleep.
The TV was on. She tried watching but there was nothing on that caught her mind, attention or heart. She just kept replaying conversations, moments, and just things that hurt. She wanted to turn the movies in her head off and focus on the TV. If only it was that easy. Her therapist had worked with her on techniques. Nothing was working. She wanted to scream. It would scare the cats. Instead she nestled deeper into the covers of the bed and pulled them around her. She left the TV on and lay there crying. She tried to not make too much noise. She didn’t want to scare the cats.
(This is part of the creative writing/fiction that I am working on.)
Internet crack? What are you talking about?! Internet crack refers to those sites which you start using and can’t STOP! You sit at the computer and the first thing you do is check the site to see what is there. It’s like a present every visit. Which sites? Facebook obviously is one. Etsy is an art lover’s dream. Pinterest is the new craze. A paradise for people who love home and arts and crafts.
My Internet crack is Facebook. If you have read my blog before you know I have a love-hate relationship with it.I won’t let myself use Pinterest right now. Why? I love arts and crafts! That’s exactly why. Right now I don’t have time to read a book for pleasure. I certainly don’t need to view a site that stimulates my mind and heart and makes me want to abandon everything to play! I’d never get anything done. I already have a stack of magazines sitting in a box ready for a craft project that I haven’t had time to work on. People keep saying, “You NEED to join Pinterest!” I know they mean well. It is the exact kind of site someone like me loves. And that is exactly why I can’t right now. I need all of the time I can hang on to.
Pinterest addiction (Photo credit: Annie Mole)
Give me a couple of months and I’ll be as big of a junkie as the rest of my friends.
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