Leave work at work!
Most days I can leave work at work. Home is my safe place from the hateful world. When I need to feel safe, I can come home and lock myself in and lock the world out. Just me and my cats. No tv (no cable). Just limited internet activity of my choosing. And the comfort of being at home. Maybe that sounds like a hermit. I’m not like that all the time. But when I am stressed and feel like screaming, that is what I need to do. Better that than treating other people crappy because I feel crappy, right? See, I acknowledge that I might take my negativity out on others when they don’t deserve it so I remove myself from situations where that might happen. Now of course there are times when I have to go somewhere and a minor bout of road rage happens. I don’t try to mow people down. I just usually curse very loudly in my car and sometimes make hand gestures for emphasis. But it is really better that I keep to myself in my sanctuary when I am feeling stressed beyond belief.
I have felt that way the last couple of days. Today I couldn’t sleep. I was stressed from work and just life in general. I wanted to leave work at work this morning when I left. I really did. But for some reason it jumped in the car and rode home with me. I don’t know how it did it, but it did. And it stayed in my head and kept me mad all day. I’m about to have to go back tonight and I dread it. I’m praying I don’t have another night like last night. If I do, I might go stark raving mad. I have to be absolutely nice even when I am not getting treated too nicely. Maybe that is why my blood pressure has been up recently? Maybe that is why I have this throbbing vein in my head? Or maybe I’m having an aneurysm? I don’t know.
What I do know is that when I leave work in the morning I am going to try to leave work at work. If it tries to jump in the car again, I’m going to kick its ass right out and leave it in the parking lot. It ain’t coming home with me again!